I am interested and can dance when you are ready.”
“No no no,” she says. “Yes, I may be interested. But I do not believe I am ready for it just yet. I am afraid I might end up being really uncomfortable.”
The next day, I call her and tell her that she doesn’t have to go. It is in our best interests, as she had been going to the dance only on her terms, she says, and she’s done talking to me about what goes on.
“I am afraid to dance,” she says, “and I am not ready to dance just yet.”
I don’t agree with her. A dance is a dance. And to be honest, I prefer my days of going down on a woman than my days of trying to control someone while she is on her knees.
“You can start dancing when you are ready,” I say to her.
“I won’t be ready to dance until I am a little older. No, that’s too bad,” she says.
“You can’t just go to the dance and expect to start dancing.”
“Yes I can,” she says firmly.
I laugh as we drive to B&H that evening, and when we turn to leave, she hands me her phone number and we hang up.
The next day she sends me a text: “I love you and you know it.” It is a reply I get quite often.
I send back a text: “I feel the same way, and I love you too.”
(From my house)
It has been a long time since I gave that girl the love I was trying to give her. And I have been wondering if that love is for me. When you meet somebody, you have to feel that love, or else you won’t know what the connection is. You have to feel it for them, not for a time, not for a couple of years, but right now as you drive away from your destination, and all the things will feel too strange.
This year, I have learned that all love isn’t a feeling or feeling. It is more like a thought. And I have learned that this thought that came to me the other day might not be the most important part of my life in the meantime – it may be the least interesting. But sometimes the simplest things become the most important.
I have found myself thinking about
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